Thursday, October 7, 2010

Review: Club Vibe

Confession time: I'm a gadget girl. A serious gadget lover. Put a new geeky electronic in front of me, and I'll disappear for hours learning everything I can about it, and just fiddling around with it. Phone? Ebook reader? Camera? Game system? Little whosit no one can figure out? I'm there. For me, a vibrator is just another kind of gadget, so an innovative, cool, and functional looking gadget of a vibrator? The Club Vibe was right up my alley.

There is a lot to love about the Club Vibe. First of all, it's a sex toy that is designed to be taken out and about in your outside-the-bedroom life. That is totally hot. Second, this bullet responds to your environment, vibrating along with the noises you hear. That's where its name comes from - when you wear this vibrator to a club, your clit gets to thump along with the music.

The controls are wonderfully intuitive, and simple (they sound more complicated than they are). One edge of the control box has a slide switch allowing you to choose between Off, On - built in functions mode, and On - Ambient mode. The bottom edge has the audio in jack (cord provided) and the volume roller. The top edge is where the bullet plugs in. The front has two fingertip-sized buttons flush with the control box. When the Club Vibe is set to Ambient, these buttons do nothing. When it is set in Function mode, the circle button turns on the vibrations and switches between functions, and the X shaped button is an instant-off. (I love this one, as I'm always bitching about wanting to be able to turn off my vibes in a hurry. This toy is wonderfully easy to use, with all its clearly labeled buttons.

The thong that came with the Club Vibe was ok. It wasn't amazing, but it wasn't a total loss, either. The fabric is soft, the scalloped edging is annoying, the stretch lace waistband is comfortable. It's supposed to be one size fits most; it fit well in some areas, and gapped in others, so it wasn't something I'd wear to feel sexy. It would work better for someone with the right body shape, but I'll be darned if I can figure out what that is supposed to be. It didn't have a pocket to put the velvety micro bullet in, so I just did what I always do when I don't want to hold a bullet - tuck it between my labia right where I want it. They hold it in place just fine, especially once I put my pants on. You could tuck it inside the vagina (though I'd recommend a condom, since it's not waterproof), in front of or behind the scrotum, or just loose in the underwear to roam where it will, but don't stick it up your butt. This is not anal-safe, and the bullet might decide to go on an unauthorized adventure!

There is a definitely learning curve with taking this toy to a noisy event. I had to fiddle with the volume quite a bit, because on Ambient, the higher the volume setting, the stronger the vibrations for the ambient noise level. I discovered a flaw in use, however. For discretion, I tucked the controller in my pocket, but the fabric muffled the sound. I was vibrating to the sound of my jeans rubbing against the microphone, not the explosions in the movie. I did eventually clip it to my waistband, and hoped that no one would wonder what the heck it was. Problem solved; it picked up the sound effects quite well, and those dramatic explosions suddenly got a lot more exciting!

Where I really ran into issues with this was when I tried to use the Club Vibe while watching porn. I love listening to all the moans and sexy vocals in porn, so vibrating that hit me in time with the moans? Should have been perfect. The Club Vibe comes with a neat little cable: it plugs into your headphone jack, you plug it into your Club Vibe, then you plug your headphones into the split second end of the cable. I found that if I kept the sound low enough that it wasn't physically hurting my ears, I got very little vibration out of the club vibe, no matter how high I turned the control pack's volume. It may have been my nice (but not uber-good) headphones; it might have been my sensitive, musician-trained ears. Either way, I couldn't get vibrations and hear the porn at the same time, which kind of defeated the point.

The Club Vibe can pack a punch. When set to its functions mode, the highest setting is quite strong, but very buzzy. It's about on par with your average 2-3 AA powered bullet. It has some fun patterns, but as usual I found myself going back to the steady settings to get off.

Even though it isn't water resistant, the Club Vibe is pretty easy to care for. The bullet, cord, and battery pack can be carefully wiped down with toy cleaning wipes or a damp cloth. Be careful to get the seam and connection point of the bullet clean, as those two spots like to collect junk. This toy is not sterilizeable, so use a condom to share. Between uses, pull out the batteries and store the whole set in the pretty included bag. OhMiBod gets major props for including this. It's a very sturdy drawstring bag made out of stretchy, almost sparkly black velvet, with OhMiBod embroidered on the front in white and pink. The control box, bullet, all cords, a set of batteries, and the thong all fit inside the bag easily, making it easy to keep track of all the pieces.

Is the club vibe worth it? That really depends on what you want it for. If you've always wanted to have a toy that vibrated along with your porn or music, you may want to pass on this one and go for one of their other toys (the original OhMiBod absolutely shone here; I don't know about the more recent models). If you want a strong microvibe to wear that will pulse with the music or the movie, then this is it. This one rocks that niche.

Thanks to Good Vibrations Sex Toys for sending me the Club Vibe!

This product was provided to me free of charge by GoodVibrations in exchange for an unbiased review. This review is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

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